by Fr. Costanzo Beschi; published April 9, 2004
The Stories of Guru Paramarta: Second Story of the Purchase of the Horse’s Egg
by Fr.Costanzo Beschi [aka, Veera MaMuni]
Front Note by Sachi Sri Kantha
Now that Sri Lanka’s President Chandrika Kumaratunga has anointed a new prime minister, Mahinda Rajapakse, for her government, foregoing the opportunity of appointing her preferential choice, Lakshman Kadirgamar, for the post, horse-trading is the name of the political game in Colombo. Numbers are needed quickly to convince the parliament and the public that she has a working majority. Chandrika and Co are indulging passionately in purchasing a few political heads who could prop up her minority government. Thus, the Second story of Guru Paramarta – penned by Fr.Costanzo Beschi – relating to purchase of the horse’s egg, is more than apt now.
Though the media hacks in Colombo, Chennai and elsewhere pay courteous tributes frequently (for their own job access) on the street smartness of President Chandrika, many dispassionate Sri Lankans would not disagree that the political track record (1994-2001) of the current Sri Lankan President is no better than that of Guru Paramarta, depicted in the first story. The five disciples of Guru Paramarta in Fr.Beschi’s story were tagged as Blockhead, Idiot, Simpleton, Fool and Dunce. If (a big If, that is!) I’m going to direct a play on Guru Paramarta, my ‘dream team’ for the roles of the five disciples of the Guru Paramarta story would be Lakshman Kadirgamar (Blockhead), Anura Bandaranaike (Idiot), Mahinda Rajapakse (Simpleton), Ranil Wickremasinghe (Fool) and Douglas Devananda (Dunce). Of course, in reality, Ranil Wickremasinghe is not a designated member of Sri Lankan President’s inner counsel. Nevertheless, for the past two years he played the political game like a closet member of Sri Lankan President’s team while squandering opportunities to assert his electorally assigned role of 2001; thus he can hardly be omitted in my ‘dream team’. Furthermore, contrary to the spin of political op-ed analysts, the track records of Ms.Kumaratunga and Mr.Wickremasinghe hardly differ substantially on the question of Tamil rights and demands, and in sincerity of solving the foremost problem facing the islanders.
One should also note that the Guru Paramarta character has an equivalent in Sinhala folklore as well; he is identified as Mahadanamutta. It is anyone’s guess whether Guru Paramarta of Fr.Beschi in turn became the role model for the Sinhalese Mahadanamutta character. Considering the tremendous borrowing of Tamil words and themes into Sinhala language and literature, this possibility cannot be discarded. I located a letter in the Colombo Daily Mirror (Nov.25, 2002), under the pseudonym ‘V.R.Krazy’ [i.e., ‘We are Crazy’ euphemized as a name] from Kandy. It was captioned as ‘Mahadanamutta updated.’ The author of this humorous missive aptly equated the bodyguards of a politico as ‘golayas’ [which in Sinhalese language refers to obedient protégé/disciple]. Excerpts:
“Mahadanamutta (MDM) has been a very popular character in our folklore. His exploits have been a source of much amusement to generations, young and old. Hence it was a pleasant surprise to see a new version of one of MDM tales – this time right under our noses at Maligawatta…In the good old days even big shots like MDM did not have Pajeros and tax payers petrol to peregrinate in. They relished perambulating bare-footed.
One rainy day MDM with his band of “golayas” was sauntering across a paddy field, when he slipped his foot to fall into the quagmire below. Though the golayas – forerunners of today’s body guards – saw the predicament their boss was in, they dared not lend a helping hand to the venerable leader, as they contended that instructions were not explicit on the nature of action that had to be instituted in such an eventuality.
MDM acted post haste. From his supine posture in the pool of mud, he scrawled his orders to extricate him from the morass. That was done pronto. MDM was immensely proud of his retinue. He commended them for their loyalty, and devotion to duty. There was no need to transfer anyone “with immediate effect”. What we saw in Maligawatta had a very strange resemblance to the above MDM episode….”
Now to the original Second Story of Guru Paramarta from Fr.Beschi. I have made marginal revision in spelling, repetitive phrases and obsolete words to the 1822 text of Benjamin Babington.
Second Story of the Purchase of the Horse’s Egg
After the Guru and his five disciples had arrived at their Retreat, they discussed the pitiable dilemma in which they had been placed in the river bank. Hearing this discussion, the old woman who swept the Retreat, said, “I am of opinion that there was a mistake in the mode in which you counted yourselves and added up the sum. If one reckons, leaving out either himself or any other person, the amount will be erroneous; however, if another occasion should occur, I will tell you a method by which such a mistake as this may be avoided. Here it is:
‘Having picked up the cow dung, which lies on the commons, collect it together, and when you have patted it smooth, gather around it, and stooping down, dip the ends of your noses in the dung. Then count the impressions made by your noses and you may thus know, without any error in the account, how many persons there are. In this very same manner, some 50 or 60 years ago, did we take account of a number of women who were collected together.’
The disciples replied, ‘This indeed is a capital plan and costs no money; it did not occur to any of us. Nevertheless, for all purposes, it will be best to buy a horse. Sir, you must by all means procure a horse.’ The Guru demanded how much the price of a horse would amount to. As they heard upon inquiry that it could not cost around 50 to 100 coins, the Guru determined that he had no ability to pay so much.
The matter thus remained in back burner for while, when one day they perceived that their milch cow which had been turned out to feed, did not return home in the evening. They sought her all over the village, but she couldn’t be found. The following day, Blockhead went to seek her in the neighboring villages. On his return to the Retreat on the third day, the Blockhead exclaimed with delight; ‘Sir, the cow I cannot find. Never mind, I have met with a horse for us at a very low price.’ The Guru demanded, ‘How is that?’ with eagerness. The Blockhead responded:
‘When I was returning, without any success of locating our milch cow, I saw four or five mares grazing on the bank of a large lake. As I checked around, in the nearby location, a number of horses’ eggs were hanging in every direction, and these eggs are so big which cannot be held in one’s two arms. When I inquired from a passerby, he told me that they were in fact true horses’ eggs and that the price of each was only four or five coins. Here is a fine opportunity, Sir. At a bargain, we can buy horse’s egg and depending on the manner in which we rear it and allow to hatch, we’ll own a high bred horse.’
Everyone consented to Blockhead’s proposition, and having paired Idiot with the Blockhead, the Guru delivered into their hands five coins and dispatched them on their journey. After Blockhead and Idiot set on their path to purchase the horse’s egg, Fool threw out a doubt. ‘Grant that the egg of a high bred horse could be obtained, and after that, one has to sit on it for that to hatch. Who in the world is to hatch it I’m not sure now. According to Blockhead, the egg is so big that one cannot hold it with his two arms. Tell us, how are we to manage in this business of hatching the horse’s egg.’ On hearing this, the group including the Guru stared at each other with astonishment, and remained speechless without opening their mouths.
After a considerable pause, the Guru addressed the remaining three disciples: ‘I see no other way but that one of us should sit on it.’ Upon hearing this, each made his excuse. First disciple said, ‘It is my business to go daily to the river and fetch all the water that is wanted and also go to the jungle and procure canes for firewood. How therefore can I possibly hatch it?’ The second one said, ‘After spending night and day without rest in the kitchen, dressing rice, cooking all curries, making fancy dishes and boiling water for everyone and killing myself at the stoves, how can the hatching be performed by me?’ The third one retorted, ‘Before day break, I go to the river and after having cleansed my teeth, rinsed my mouth, washed my face, purified my hands and feet, and completed all my schedules, I have to go round the flower gardens, cull the new buds, bring them hither without damage, tie long garlands, decorate the idols with flowers while worshipping and assist daily at the worship. Such is my business; is it not? Then how can I hatch it?’
Hearing the pleas, the Guru replied, ‘This is all quite true; neither can it be accomplished by the other two who are gone now; for one of them has more business than he can finish in making inquiries of guests, in giving answers to the questions raised by guests, and in hearing and settling the disputes which are brought to him. Finally, Blockhead; on all occasions when we wish to transact any business, is he not the person who visits the shops and fairs in the villages? So, it is very true that you must follow those occupations which constantly require your attention. For my part, am I not here doing nothing? I will place the egg in my lap, embrace it with my arms, cover it with the skirt of my cloth, hug it in my bosom, guard it with tenderness and thus hatch it. It is enough if we do but produce the horse, we need not mind the trouble to endure.’
While all this deliberation was taking place in the Retreat, the two (Blockhead and Idiot) who had set out with the rising moon, after a journey of more than 25 miles, bent their course towards the mark which they had before seen and noticed, and arrived at the pumpkin field bordering the lake.borders of the lake. On locating the field, being greatly delighted, they went to the caretaker and pleaded: ‘Master, we earnestly want you to give us one of these horses’ eggs.’ The caretaker, seeing their idiocy, said, ‘Hey-hey! Do you suppose yourselves fit to buy such a high bread horses’ eggs as these? These are very costly.’ To this, Blockhead and Idiot replied, ‘Our Guru has given us five coins. Look here, take your five coins and give us a good egg.’ The caretaker then answered, ‘You are, to be sure, fine honest fellows. In consideration of your good manners, I consent to let you purchase at this price. So, select an egg of your liking, and go your way. But be sure that you do not tell others that you have obtained it at this bargain price.’ Then, both selected a pumpkin which appeared larger than all the rest, and were set to return to the Retreat.
The Blockhead carefully placed the horse egg in his egg and walked, while the other walked before him cleaning the obstacles. Blockhead began to talk; ‘Our forefathers have said, Those who perform penance will receive their reward. We have now seen the proof of this with our own eyes. This in truth is the profit which accrued by the penance continually performed by our Guru. A high bred horse, which is worth a 100 or 150 coins, we purchase and take to him for five coins.’ The Idiot replied, ‘I bet it. Hast thou not heard the saying, From pious actions alone proceeds delight; all else is irrelevant and unworthy of praise. From virtue, not only profit, but pleasure proceeds.’
Thus conversing, after they had walked for considerable distance, the pumpkin – placed in the Blockhead’s head – struck a bough of a tree which was bent and hanging down, suddenly dashed out of Blockhead’s hands and rolled over towards a bush; it cracked and fell into pieces. Upon this, a hare which was lying in the bushes jumped and ran. Alarmed at the turn of event, Blockhead and Idiot cried out, ‘Behold! The horse’s foal which was in the shell had run away’. They followed the hare to seize it. Running and chasing the hare all around the hills, woods and grass, they followed the hare, but only to lose their clothes and suffer abrasions in their skins. Puffing and blowing with fatigue and their bowels jolting, the Blockhead and Idiot gave up their chase, suffering from fatigue. Regardless of their weariness, they then rose and with legs limping and wounded by thorns, stones and stumps, Blockhead and Idiot returned to the Retreat after the sunset.
When they entered the Retreat’s gate, they cried loudly, ‘Alas! Alas!’ and fell down. Those in the Retreat demanded, ‘What is it? What is it? What harm has come to you?’ A little later, Blockhead composed himself and spoke as follows: ‘O Guru, since the day I was born, I never beheld so swift a horse as this; of an ash color, mixed with black; in form and size like a hare, and a cubit in length. Although a foal still in the nest, it pricked up its two ears, cocked its tail which rose up the length of two fingers, extended and stretched forth its four legs, and with its heart close to the ground, ran with a swiftness and impetuosity which can neither be expressed nor conceived.’
Upon this, all disciples began wailing, when the Guru appeased them saying, ‘True indeed, the five coins are gone. However, its good that the horse’s foal is gone also. If a foal could run in this manner, when it becomes fully grown, who will be able to ride upon it? I truly am an old man; a horse of this description, my disciples, although if presented to me gratis, I would not accept.’
[Source: Benjamin Babington – The Adventures of the Gooroo Paramartan- A Tale in the Tamul Language, accompanied by a translation and vocabulary together with an analysis of the first story, 1999 reprint of the 1822 original published in London by J.M.Richardson, pp.51-59.]